Control, Influence and Release
When we take on leadership responsibility we often think that we will now have greater control over our work than previously, and there is some truth to that. However, we soon realise that there is a vast array of things over which we have little control. People don’t behave as expected or fulfil our expectations of them; socially and politically decisions are taken by others that impact us; emergencies, just like the present pandemic, occur that change the context of our work. There are so many things that happen over which our control is limited, if not non-existent, and we have to learn to lead in such circumstances. Our natural reaction when life circumstances are not under our control is to worry, and worry is really the reaction in our minds as we try to regain some semblance of control even when it is not possible.
When things are out of our control worry doesn’t do any good. Instead, we should think next of influence. If we cannot control, can we influence a situation or person? What ways can we bring our influence to bear within the specific circumstances we are facing? For example, if we are facing a financial crisis in our business that may lead to making people redundant, can we talk to our creditors or to our Board about alternatives for investment? Can we influence decisions that might be taken by writing a discussion paper or speaking with certain people? These are initiatives in influence that might or might not make a difference.
Finally, when things are not in our control and we have brought whatever influence we have to bear on a situation, our last step is to release. This is the hardest step to take but is necessary for our own well-being as well as the well-being of others. It means acknowledging that things may not work out the way we wanted; it means being prepared for the worst case scenario; it means moving towards acceptance of circumstances we neither chose nor wanted. It is difficult but necessary. My experience is that, as we mature in our leadership, it becomes easier to do so because we all learn the hard way that worry never changes anything while always being in control is just not possible.
